....

I don't want to hear that again!! I hate it, related things, scenes, sounds.... I don't want to see that. My mind is so weak facing this. All I want is to make my mind free and concentrate on someting that make me useful for this world, make me feel I am useful. Why I always hear or see that, that make me feel ill, make me lose my concentration, lose my self-confidence, my courage. I can't bear that any more, I am out of my mind, I always secret my feelings, my emotions, my tears. I always pretend I am happy, I am doing someting wonderful. I always let movies, food, reading something in the virtual world hocus me, hocus my mind, my brain and my heart . This can stop me thinking about something that would harm me. I am indulge my life, my mind, my purpose, I know that, but how can I get out. I can't find a way to get out. I need complete freedom. This year, please go quickly!